Wednesday, June 28, 2006

Superman Returns!!!

I remember being very worried when I saw Brandon Routh and Kate Bosworth on the cover of Entertainment Weekly. The first thing that popped out of my mouth was, "Superman has blue eyes...not brown. Whatever." Needless to say, I got over it. I saw the movie tonight and Superman does indeed have blue eyes...and a few other things too.

If you haven't seen the movie and you don't want spoilers I suggest you run away right now!

Spoilers Below!!!

The movie (as you have probably heard) picks up five years after the second Superman film. Lex Luthor has managed to escape prison (again) because SM didn't make his court appearance to testify against him. With the help of Kitty (Lex's new skank) Lex manages to hook up with some old broad who leaves him her millions. He takes the money and runs to find SM's Fortress of Solitude.

Kevin Spacey usually annoys me. His smugness really works for Lex Luthor. I always thought Gene Hackman was about as menacing as Mighty Mouse in the old films. The new Lex is a great improvement! He's a little more ruthless and still manages to get a few good laughs. His last scene is awesome. Parker Posey seems to be in a completely different film! I love the grand Ms Posey but Bryan Singer (the director) really doesn't give her a lot to do. What a missed opportunity! The best thing about Kitty is her cannibalistic dog! I will never look at lap dogs the same way again! Awesome!

Life has gone on for the people in Smallville and Metropolis. Lois Lane has even won a Pulitzer Prize for her article "The World Doesn't Need Superman". Long suffering Ma Kent is pining away for her missing child when (BOOM) a meteor crashes down the road from the Kent farm. Clark is back. Eva Marie Saint plays Martha Kent and I just loved her. She didn't seem nearly as fragile as the previous actress. I could believe this woman raised Superman.

Clark shows back up at the Daily
Planet and finds out Lois is almost married with a kid! Jimmy Olsen (aggravating as ever) is the one who fills him in on what has been going on. I HATE Jimmy Olsen. He has always been the most retarded part of the Superman mythos. I just want to beat the shit out of him and break his damned camera. What a worthless piece of shit. Sam Huntington does what he can with the character. I am certainly not dissing the poor actor. I'm just saying he has a thankless part.

While Clark and Jimmy are having a drink, Lois is one of many reporters on a big-ass plane that has a space shuttle attached to it. I'm not going to go into details but some complicated shit goes down and the shuttle and plane are going to crash. This is definitely a job for SM!
This first action scene is kick ass! I am sure I'm not the only one in the audience t
hat wanted to jump up and down screaming "GO SUPERMAN". When he lands the plane in the middle of a stadium full of adoring fans you know you are going to enjoy this film.

Lois and SM finally talk to each other on the roof of the Daily
Planet and let me tell you: Superman is effing HOT! He can fly this Miss Piggy any where any time. Work it out SM!!!
Kate Bosworth is pretty good as Lois Lane. Everyone always says that Brandon Routh (the new Superman) has big shoes to fill.


Well in my opinion Kate Bosworth had some pretty big ass pumps to fill too! Margot Kidder was the bomb as Lois Lane back in the day! But that was during the whole women's lib movement and her take on Lois made her so much more than SM's bitch. Kate Bosworth's Lois is a mom. She doesn't really have a great kick ass moment in this movie. Kate isn't bad as Lois...she just has nothing to do...sort of like Kitty.

The kid (Jason) and the new boyfriend (Richard) could have faded away. I suspect some annoyed fanboys are hoping they will go away. I could have done without the kid. His crazy hair and cute one liners made me want to barf. You could have knocked me over with a feather when he threw the piano at the bad guy. That's right folks...Superman is that baby daddy!!! The kid doesn't know. Richard doesn't either. SM only found out at the end of the film!


I would like to take a moment to commend Richard White (James Marsden)...the unsung hero of Superman Returns. Here is this someone who is just a normal (nice) guy. His girl obviously had something with the Man of Steel and he chooses to take the high road and trusts her not to dick him over. No crazy "I'm gonna out hero the hero" crap! He actually does end up saving SM's ass in the movie and as far as "his" kid is concerned he is a hero. I think he is too. Bravo Richard...you rock the casba!

I feel like I'm starting to ramble so I want to get this out too. Brandon Routh was great! He seemed a little more subtle than Christopher Reeve but let me tell y'all he was just as good. BR's SM was very elegant. He seemed like royalty when he'd swoop in to save the day. He totally grows on you. I didn't expect to like him and was so surprised when I did. You go BR! I think you did just fine!!!

The special effects are great too! There are only a few moments when you notice the CGI...and they quickly correct themselves. The costumes were pretty good...I didn't mind the changes to SM's costume...I do wish the body suit was cut away from his neck though. I always felt like he was choking! Lois Lane's shoes were really cute!

I wish Bryan Singer hadn't told us the kid belonged to Superman. I also wish he hadn't done the lame ass Jesus shot toward the end. Learn to write female characters Bryan!
In the end I think I give the film thumbs up!!! It will bring out the kid in you!

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Jimmy Olsen is one of my favorite characters. I identify with him. And I liked him in the movie.

BishopJ said...

whatever tim. We'll discuss this when you get home!